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1. You go to drop off one person to the airport, but you take 10 extra people with you
2.Your entire family runs the marathon when they see a dog
3. Your cousin is said to have "gone abroad to get married", but u know he’s doing time in prison
4.You were taught neva to talk to strangers at primary school, yet your parents force you to call a complete stranger "Auntie"
5."Paracetamol" is your cure to every illness
6. You somehow think you’re related to Prince Naseem Hamed
7. Your remote control is still in its plastic packet
8. You use your religion to get yourself out of almost anything e.g. P.E, class discussions, debates, etc.
9. "GET YOUR BACK-UP DOWN" and "KICK OFF!" is your solution to every problem
10. You studied A’ Level Maths but still think it’s possible to fit 20 people into 1 car
11. You wear sunglasses in hail, sleet and snow
12. Your mobile phone "just happens to ring" when you see a member of the opposite sex
13. You secretly watch "ZEE T.V." but pretend you’ve never heard of it
14. "My mate wants to check ya!" is secretly your chat-up line
15. You think you’re part of the MAFIA, yet you study Law
16. You think it’s a sin if you admit you’ve revised before an exam
17. You wonder why the person you fancy doesn’t come over when you and your mates scream, "Yo! Come over ‘ere!"
18. At the age of 30, you still think you can get away with paying child fare on the bus
19. Find a photo of a man with bushy hair, white shoes and sunglasses…you ask who he is and find out it’s your uncle
20. You’re related to your husband/wife even before you’ve married them
21.ur the last person to see your wedding card … and the person you’re getting married to
22.You dance at a complete stranger’s wedding (and claim you are a distant relative)
23. You somehow think you were involved in Tu Pac’s death
24.You achieve A*’s in every subject and your parents tell you to STUDY HARDER
25. Your mum asks you what you want to be when you’re 6 six years old and you say, "A Bollywood Superstar"…ten years later you’re still saying the same thing
26. You think you’re life is just ONE BIG INDIAN FILM
27. You somehow think you are a member of the F.B.I and therefore have to have code-name for everything e.g. T.P.
28. You seem to think that an ordinary car is a racing car and ordinary roads are racing tracks, thus explaining why you speed around thinking you’re Damon Hill
30. You hardly ever take prescribed medicines because your parents have their own herbal cures at home
31. Unknown "relatives" start ringing your house on the day that your exam results are coming out
32. Your parents have a PANIC ATTACK when something dirty comes on TV.
33. You have 3 hobbies: CHILL, CHILL and CHILL
34. You have to offer guests tea even before they’ve stepped into your house
35. Girls: Your brother thinks he’s your dad
36. You know how an Indian film will end even before it’s started (but you still watch it)
37. You go to a wedding with an empty car, but on the way back you end up giving the entire population of the wedding a lift home (and you haven’t seen half of these people in your life)
38. At school, your parents were never aware of Parents’ Evening (…and if they did attend Parents’ Evening and you got a bad report, you told them that the teachers were all racist)
39. You arrive late at every party
40. At weddings the cameraman only ever cameras you when you’re eating
41. In college, you either witnessed or were involved in a fight
42. Your parents find no criticisms in an Indian film where some guy jumps off a cliff and jumps back up again, people burst into song when their relatives are dying, evil politicians rule the world, and even the police don’t give a crap (and then they wonder why you prefer to watch "East enders")
43. You have attended every MELA ever organized
44. You know the lyrics to every Indian song ever written, but you deny it
45. You are constantly being compared to every other Asian kid on the Planet
46. You pronounce English words in a typical accent when speaking to your parents e.g. toilet: "Toylat"
47. You own a gold chain with your name engraved on it
48. Guys: you lock your sister up and then go out chilling yourself
49. You have cousins that you’ve never even heard of
50. When celebrating a religious festival, you suddenly feel the need to scream and shout, dance on top on restaurants, cars… and even your friend’s shoulders!
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